Conflict Resolution 101 for Couples: The Best Way to Resolve Conflicts

As a young person, you probably had lots of dreams and thoughts about how you wanted your relationship or marriage to go. You must have thought about all the laughter, smiles, joy and love both of you would share. But for some strange reason we hardly ever think about the inevitable conflicts couples experience, or how such conflicts should be resolved, or more importantly how to say ‘I am sorry’ and move on.

Relationships ideally involve two people with different ideas, and backgrounds coming together to act as one. That defines the following equation:

2 different people + Different Ideas + Different Backgrounds = Occasional Conflicts

Conflicts are therefore a normal part of all relationships, but how conflicts are handled and resolved is what differentiates good relationships from devastating relationships.

So what is the best way to resolve conflict?

Immediately or as at least as soon as possible!

Once you sense that you and your partner are about to get into a fight over an issue, then it is time to change the topic! If it’s too late and both of you have already gotten into a fight, then give each other some space and time to reflect on what just happened. This is the best response, as prolonging fights only makes both of you say things you would latter wish you had never said and unfortunately cannot be taken back.

Once tempers have cooled down, you can then restart the conversation from a different angle. Come to an agreement that each partner must listen to every word the other has to say without interrupting and with a view to understanding the other person’s point of view. Then continue the conversations until both of you are willing to shift ground enough to agree on a resolution that suits you both.

This conflict resolution technique is based on developing effective communication skills with your partner and it has had a record 90 percent success rate amongst my clients and I suggest try it out the next time you are in a conflict situation.

Thanks for Reading
Dammie

Check out the lastest testimonial we got from a couple who applied this technique:

"Your information and tools provided in your tape and books have been very valuable for me in transforming my relationship. Over the past few years I have read numerous relationship books to help me have a wonderful, passionate relationship. Nothing compares to your books." - Sue Afrasiabi of Melbourne, Australia

Is she the one for you? How to know if she is the woman of your dreams!

Most guys reach a stage in life when the thrill of ‘living the fast life’ starts to ware off and they begin to crave more stable relationships. For men at that stage of life, it is definitely not the time for trial and error…

So how can you tell if a woman is right for you?

Let me start by stating that there are no universal rules that differentiate the wrong woman from right. What’s good for one person may be totally destructive to another. That is why you have to be able to determine what is good for you.

Firstly you need to have an image of your ideal woman in your mind, now you would to picture beyond the hot body, and ‘Angelie Jolie lips’ to get a true picture. Now from this image, write down the attributes your woman MUST have. Must she be supportive, homely, outgoing, funny, reserved, good looking, ambitious, chubby? This section of your list should have attributes you simply can’t do without in a lady, make sure the list is as exhaustive as possible.

Are you done? Okay let’s go on…

Now take a second look at your list. You would find that some attributes in that list are more important to you than others. In fact there are probably some attributes that you can forgo if you have the others in place. For example, you may be willing to forego the blonde hair, if you can get a level of integrity that impresses you. So that makes blonde hair your ‘maybe’. Now move all the attributes that you feel you can compromise on to another list – your ‘maybe’ list. That’s a list of attributes you’d like your lady to have but that you can do without and still remain happy and satisfied.

Now your job just got easier -

How do you know the woman of your dreams? You now have a list. Just find the woman that has most or all the attributes on your ‘must have’ list and a sizable number of the attributes on your ‘maybe’ list, and you are guaranteed to have found the woman of your dreams.

Now you know what you want in the woman of your dreams, let me show you how to find her and get here attracted to you!

Fantastic Sex For Couples - Just How Much Talk is Too Much Talk?

This was a very hot topic at a recent marriage seminar I attended.

The debate started when one of the attendees complained that her hubby, never talks to her during sex. These were her words: 'All he does is to make those annoying sounds I like talking when I am having sex, and just one more month of this silent sex rounds would simply drive me crazy.'

Suddenly there was a burst of noise in the room. Everyone had something to say, and they were all saying it at the same time. The organizers finally got some order into the room, and everyone took turns to make their comments.

I'll share some comments with you:

Comment #1 - by Sally : "On the contrary, my husband talks too much, and I just can't stand it. He is always going on about one fantasy or the other. I wish I could trade places with you" she concluded facing the lady that started the topic.

Comment #2- by Jane : "My husband loves to give loads of suggestions especially when it comes to positioning during sex and how we should do it.Once in a while he passes a harsh comment on how I am not getting it right, then starts to wonder why I suddenly got turned off and sometimes I even have to fake it just to get it over with."

Comment #3 - by Kanu : "My Wife is also like that. She likes to dish out lots of instructions during sex. Sometimes I think like she should just get on top and be the man. We have discussed the issue several times, but I don't think she can help herself when it comes to that"

Comment #4 - by Paul : "My wife talks a lot and it gets me wild I really like it especially when
she talks dirty. In fact we both talk a lot during sex and sex with her is the best sex I have ever had."

The comment session ended on that note, and also did the seminar after a few words from and expert.

Comment from the Expert:

There are probably as many views of sex as there are people and each couple needs to discuss and resolve their individual views about sex and communication during sex if they are to have a great sex life. The secret is in communication, and in trying out what each partner enjoys and ultimately developing a style that you both would simply love.


Cheers

Dammie

P.S: Don't forget to leave your own comments!

For Love Or Money - How to Know If She is in Love With You Or Your Money

"How do I know if she loves me for My Money?" - The first time I was asked this question was about a year ago when I was speaking at a singles boot camp, and since then the number of times I have been asked the same question has increased rapidly. So I have decided to share my answers with everyone.

In these days of increasing financial instability, more and more men wish to uncover the true motives of the ladies they associate with. Here are a three tips to help you in your bid:

Tip 1: Check her track records: With little background checks, and by asking her 'casual questions', you can gain an insight to the kind of men she has dated in the past. If they all have one thing in common - lots of free cash to spare - then you may have some reason to be suspicious, but don't jump into conclusions just yet.

Tip 2: Abrupt changes in her live style: What was her spending like when you just met? How much has changed since then? Does she suddenly have an overwhelming urge to wear the latest 'designer' stuff which she never had before you both met? Is there a rising need to eat in the most expensive restaurants in town or to get a new car? If her demands have been on an 'unusual' increase since she met you, then chances are that she is in it for the cash.

Tip 3: Does she show undue financial interest in you? : Is she constantly in search for information about changes in your net worth or monthly pay? It might just be a show of curiosity if she asks once in a while, but when her investigations become an obsession then you need to watch out.

There you have it, 3 tips to help you determine if she is in it for love or money

Recommendation:

So what if she is only in it for the money? There should be no doubt about your next steps: Break away from that lady fast and go get yourself a more deserving lady. Here are two trusted, must have, resources to help you get a replacement fast:

Resource 1: Approach and Attract Women With Ease

Resource 2: Get Her To Love You Fast!

It's time to move on and you need to act now!

Cheers

Dammie

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Commitment Phobia - Discover How to Overcome Your Commitment Fear Issues

First let me state this: If the simple thought of getting committed sends the chills down your spine, then you probably have commitment phobia. The good news is that you are not the only one with commitment fears, but the better news is that many people with commitment phobia have learnt to overcome their fears, and move on with their lives - so can you!

The first step is to get to the root of your commitment fears. For example: I had a friend who had lived through several heart breaks, and when she finally met the guy who really wanted to marry her, she pushed him away, because she could not shake off the feeling that the proposed marriage would end in yet another heartbreak. The root of her commitment fears was in her past disappointments, and she had to face and overcome her past before she could move on - and she did.

Other root causes of commitment fears could be: fear of loosing your freedom or control, fear of giving up your personal dreams or desires for the relationship, fear of disappointing the other person etc. Whatever it is, the key to overcoming your commitment fears is to first determine the root cause of your fears, once you've dealt with the roots, the tree comes down.

The most practical way to overcome your commitment fears is to take things slowly.

Mostly your commitment fears would be reignited when you feel your present relationship is moving too fast, or when your partner starts to expect more commitment from you. When this happens, take out time to discuss your challenges with your partner. You could both decide to put long range intentions on hold for a while, work on taking the relationship one step at a time and you would be well on the path to success.

Many people with commitment fears have learnt to overcome thier fears and gone on to build happy relationships. Why should your story be any different?

Check out the following expert recommendations, following them should help reduce pressures which lead to commitment fears:

Introduce excitement into your relationship. Make it more fun, and less pressures. Also make sure you Maintain an Exciting Love and Sex Life!

Going on Creative Dates is also a great way to reduce pressures which lead to commitment phobia.

Work on these recommendation, and enjoy the change!

Dammie
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So Why Do Women Cheat? Here Are Some Answers For You!

Do you suspect that your woman is cheating on you? Has she behaving unusually? Have you discovered her telling frequent lies about here whereabouts? Then you've probably got the right to be suspicious. But before you go jumping into conclusions, it's important you know why women cheat in the first place.

So Why do Women Cheat?

In my many meetings with women I have been able to deduce from our conversations one major reasons, why a wife would cheat on her husband. I have uncovered many other reasons why wives cheat, but this issue has been the root cause of all cases of cheating.


The top reason why a woman would cheat is unhappiness.

A woman who is in an unhappy relationship, or who is unhappy in her relationship has a 95% tendency to look outside her relationship for happiness.

Here's the reason:

From very tender ages women tend to dream about their marriages and how perfect they wish it would be. when a woman eventually gets married, she would give all she's got to make it work. If things still don't work out despite all her efforts, she gets unhappy and depressed, and she would normally cling to the next thing that looks like happiness - this is usually another man who can show her a bit of compassion and show her that he understands what she has been going through.

Once the woman senses that she has found understanding, she begins to confide in 'the other guy' more and more, and soon enough she begins to feel an emotional attraction to him and with just a little effort from the guy and you've got yourself a cheating wife.


Caution:

Once you sense unhappiness or dissatisfaction in your relationship, you need to address the issues promptly. That's the best way to escape the 'gulf' that pushes one or both partners to cheat.

Recommendations:

So you despretely want to know if your wife is cheating? Find out some advanced detection techniques Here!

Do you know that by making your marriage happier you can eliminate all cheating tendencies. Find out how to improve your marriage Here!

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How to attract a guy by Being Yourself

I hope it is no secret to you that most men love independent women. I once had the privilege to interview a small group of men on the kind of women they easily got attracted to, and their answers were stunning...

If you where to choose one thing to attract you to a lady what would that one thing be?

That was the question we asked at the interview. First the replies came on a light mode, with each guy referring to different physical features that would attract him to a girl. That was fun.

Then we got more serious, and stated that if the lady were to be his life partner, then what would he look out for. Suddenly references to physical attributes reduced, and the men came up with other personal and intellectual attributes that would attract them to a lady. Before we ended the session, there was a general agreement that what men find most attractive in a woman is her ability to be herself independent of a man. A woman who has her own goals, desires, ambitions and strong values is simply irresistible to most men.

So how can you tap into this information as a woman?

Be yourself, and the right man would follow. Don’t be that woman waiting and praying for a man to come along to ‘complete her’. Do the things you’ve always dreamt of doing, build your values and chase your ambitions. While you are busy being yourself and doing all the things you love, you’ll find yourself attracting all the right men, and your great challenge would be to choose the man you are most attracted to.

Do you know there are many more ways to attract a guy? Find out the most effective way here!

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